Never Again
by FembotAxel
Summary: Axel saves Roxas. Roxas finds out Sora's secretly gay. Everybody's hiding something, but does everyone always tell? What's Roxas' secret? Will Axel's wildest dream ever become reality? Yaoi, Lemon, Axel.Roxas, Angst
1. He Gained My Respect

**Never Again**

_- He Gained My Respect -_

It felt like my heart had just been ripped out of my chest and shredded.

I don't know why, but my body froze... I couldn't think, I couldn't breathe. My eyes just gaped at the two before me, my hands clenching into fists. To just think, after two years of being so close to her... She betrays me. My mouth opened, but no words came out... I was overwhelmed. I never thought in my wildest dreams that this day would come.

"Roxas? Wha-- What are you doing here?" She frowned, her eyes half lidded as the other man looked coldly at me. I could tell he was pissed, I could tell I was hurt. My eyes closed slowly and I turned around... All I wanted to do was go home and lay down... To think about things. But he wanted something else.

"Namine? Who's this bastard!?" She started to speak, but her voice dissappeared as she watched him comfront me. "Have you been cheating on me with this... Boy?" I observed him closly, his light brown hair fell to his shoulders and I could tell he was quite older then both me and Namine.

"Marluxia.. No! Damn it... I hate it when you're high, you never listen to me!" Her delicate fingers twitched as she held back the urge to hit something. I could see the hate in her eyes... So clear that it hurt. Why was I there? Why was I in the mall? All I wanted was to go meet up with Sora and Kairi, and later I was going to call Namine and invite her... But in a matter of five minutes, my whole day was ruined.

"Than who is he, Namine? Why'd you get all worked up when you saw him?" Marluxia wasn't acting his usual self... Sure I never _met_ the guy before, but I saw him around town and Riku, my cousin's best friend, hangs out with Marluxia's gang.

"Hey, dude... I'm just a life-long friend of hers... I was coming here to meet up with some friends and I found her here with an older guy... I guess she didn't want me to think she was a slut or something... So lay off it." I watched her grab his arm as I walked away, going up to the food court. My life didn't feel over though... For some reason I wasn't even upset anymore. I just smiled a little as I caught up with Sora and Kairi, they were holding hands like the cute couple they've always been.

"Roxas? Are you okay?" I looked up into Sora's eyes and smiled. I knew he'd ask me sooner or later, I took a deep breath and told him everything. He understood me like he was a part of me... Sometimes it was a little scary... But he was the most trustworthy person I knew. "Well, Roxas... Maybe you didn't really _love_ her. I mean... I don't know why else you wouldn't be upset right now. I mean... If the person I loved did that to me... I'd kill 'em." I nodded slowly as we got up and left the mall.

"Oh.. Riku! Riku.. Over here!" Sora called for his best friend as we passed PacSun, but I noticed something I never noticed before. Riku came up to Sora, and when he thought nobody was looking, he kissed him... On the lips. I was disgusted... But made a mental note to ask Sora about that later.

-----------------------------------

Thankfully, Riku was nice enough to give us all a ride to each of our houses. But of course, I watched his actions towards Sora with great scrutiny. Once we reached Sora's house, I got out of the car along with him, "Hey, Sora? I'm going to stay at your house for a little bit, okay?" He was startled, but accepted my invitation. I followed my cousin and closed the door behind us as we entered his room. "Sora... Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, of course." He took a seat and watched me as I paced... Just a little. His azure eyes were now impatient as he cocked his head, looking just like the little kid I've always known.

"What's the deal with you and Riku?" His head jerked up as I looked away from him, I didn't want to hurt him or make him mad... I just wanted the truth. He stared at me for a while, never blinking, but finally coming to a stop as he stood and picked up a picture of him, Kairi and Riku... I looked over his shoulder from far away to see that they were on Destiny Island.

"I don't want to hurt her, Roxas. I don't want to hurt anybody with my choice. I like her, you know... Kairi. But he is so much... Different than her. He makes me smile by doing the simpliest things... I don't know why I did it. But I've fallen in love with him, Roxas." I could see the tears at the corners of his eyes as he still stared at the picture... Holding it tight.

"I don't know what to say. What the hell _is _there to say?" He ignored me, he looked scared. I didn't know what to do... I mean, I just found out that my closest friend, and relative, was gay. "Sora... I'm going to leave you alone okay? I don't want to bother you right now.. I'm sure you want some time alone." He nodded as I left, I didn't know where I was going, but I just let my legs take me there.

-----------------------------------

Arcade. I don't know how I ended up there... But I was at the arcade that I always went to when I was a pre-teen. I laughed to myself, but got on the empty Dance Dance Revolution game, and played until my heart was content. But I guess I didn't notice the four guys staring at me the whole time: Marluxia, Demyx, Zexion and Axel. Axel was the only one that ever treated me in a nice way, I guess you could put it like that. His fiery attitude could piss anyone and everyone off, but he never was that bad to me. The only thing I feared, was that Marluxia would come over and start something with me.

"Hey, Roxas! Come over here!" Of course that dumb ass had to call me over. I knew he'd start something. I shook my head and wiped the sweat away from my face as I walked over. "What are you doing here after you and me just had a little spat at the mall? You should have known I'd want to start something with you." Now.. Isn't that ironic? I took a deep breath and looked at him, his eyes were dilated, no wonder he was acting like that. See, when he isn't high, he's the coolest person to hang out with, but for some reason, the weed and everything else creates a whole new personality.

"Look, Marluxia, I already told you that I'm just friends with her. I'm not dating her, she doesn't like me like that, and I don't care if you date her or whatever." He rolled his eyes and pinned me to the wall, Axel was watching along with the others. His body was fully against mine, I tried pushing him away but he was just too strong. I saw Axel's eyes as they looked right at me... Okay, I've known him for about two years and we're decent acquaintances, but I never expected him to do what he did. I gasped as the red head pulled him away from me, and punched him in the face.

"Roxas! Go on home, I'll take care of this bastard!" I could feel my heart beating faster and faster as Marluxia ran after me, Axel quickly grabbing his waist and held him back. "Go on!"

-----------------------------------

I slammed the door behind me, my heart was still racing. I wasn't an idiot, I saw the flash of metal in Marluxia's hand when he pinned me to the wall. Knife or gun, whatever it was, Axel had saved my life. I jumped slightly as my cell vibrated in my pocket. "Hello?" I could hear deep breathing and footsteps in the background.

"Roxas? It's me, Axel. Sorry about earlier... But could you open your window?" I glanced at my closed window and raised an eyebrow. "Please? It's kind of raining." I reluctantly walked over and pulled back the curtains, closing my cell and throwing it on my bed. He smiled goofily as I looked at him and shook my head, opening the window.

"What are you doing here?" He ran his hands through his soaked hair and looked at me, his emerald eyes somewhat dull. I stared at him as he looked around my room, I was growing impatient by the second.

"Well... I felt like I would come over and explain things to you. But then it started raining.. So now I have to ask you a question." I raised my eyebrow again and looked at him questionably, waiting for him to ask the question. "Can I maybe take a shower here while you put my clothes in the drier? Because I don't want to get your room dirty or anything... Okay?" I sighed, but agreed. I stood outside of my bathroom and waited for him to hand me the clothes, but he never did. So I had to walk in there and grab them off of the floor, quickly running out. After I placed the clothes in the drier, I walked into the kitchen, grabbing some beer from the fridge. I knew I shouldn't have drank more then two, but I was scared, pissed, confused, and hurt.

"Roxas? What are you doing?" The red head walked over to me in a towel, his eyes were studying me as I lay on the bed. I didn't feel bad, I didn't feel sick. I just felt.. Worthless. The girl I had been with for two years left me, and yet I wasn't upset. I was almost killed, and yet I just went home and got drunk. I cried. Like the pussy I was... I cried. And he comforted me. I laid my head in his lap and he stroked my hair... I didn't feel worthless anymore. I felt... Alive. My heart skipped a beat as his finger stroked down my spine, tickling me slightly. But he smiled down at me... He wasn't acting like the smart-ass everyone knew. I could tell that he was calm, relaxed, and in a totally different mood then he was the other times I'd met him. Sure we hung out before, but it was always in public, but I guess people act different in different places. I actually missed the smart come backs he always supplied. But at least he knew I was upset about something, and he was giving me time to calm down. He was a good friend, though we hardly ever talked, though we hardly ever saw each other. He was there for me then... When I needed somebody the most. I had developed respect for him at that very moment. He was different then Marluxia and the other gang members. And I appreciated that.

**- Midnights Heart -**

_I'll update this soon, and there will probably be lemon in the next chapter... And I probably won't keep Roxas' point of view, I'll probably either change it to regular, or switch them each chapter. Review if you liked it... And I know this first chapter was kind of slow, but I had to start somewhere. I think the plot for this will be a great one. Please review!_


	2. Unappreciated

**Never Again**

_- Unappreciated -_

Did I say I appreciated it? Well, I might've last night, but I didn't want to **wake **up next to him. Sure, he saved my life I guess, but that doesn't mean he can sleep in my bed... Especially when I'm still in it. I glared at him as he rolled over and hit me with his arm, his emerald green eyes slowly opening and looking up at me with a smirk. "Fuck you, Axel." He frowned, but sat up and snickered to himself.

"I'm not gay... Got it memorized?" That was the guy I knew, the smart-ass red-head with a fiery personality... And you can't forget that infamous quote, "Got it memorized?" I never did care much for the guy, but I guess what happened the day before... Kind of brought us closer. Maybe... Even to a **friendship** level. Throughout my entire life, I've never had a huge amount of friends, so I knew I'd accept his request if he offered... And I had a feeling he wanted something along those lines.

"Roxas? You zoning out or something? You look kinda stoned." His eyes slowly filled with mischievous mirth as I turned from my dead gaze at the floor and looked at him.

"Thank you..." I spoke softly, my voice almost unheard as the rain panged against the roof.

"For what? Helping you escape your fantasy land?" I rolled my eyes as I got up and walked to my door, turning around as he spoke again. "I was kidding." He looked at me from his bed, his hair messy and tangled from his long sleep. I cocked my head and just stared at him, holding back a smile.

"Thanks for helping me out yesterday... A lot." I watched him as he tilted his head back and closed his eyes.

"Any time, Roxas. I might not know you very well, but you're too young to die.. You're what? Fifteen?" I stared at him with a dead-pan expression and walked over to him, playfully punching him on the arm.

"Dude, Axel? I'm freaking eighteen!" He shrugged and snickered a little as he stood and walked over to me... His eyes seemed to glow...

"Well, y'know... Those blue eyes look so damn innocent... But I guess it's true that looks can be deceiving." I didn't hate him, I didn't like him a lot.. But he wanted to help me, Hell, he already did help me. I don't know if Marluxia really would've hurt me... But at least I knew Axel cared. But.. I don't really look fifteen do I? I laughed to myself a little as I nodded and watched him crawl out of my room through the window he came through last night. After he winked at me with those daring emerald eyes, he smiled. "I'll see you around, Roxas."

I don't know why, but knowing that he **wanted** to see me again.. It made me smile.

* * *

Yawn. Practically what I've been doing all day since Axel left. I don't know if I'm tired, or just bored out of my mind.. Whatever it is, it's annoying as Hell. My mind has been wondering a lot lately, though. I've been thinking of her a lot. Yeah... Namine. And even Olette, from Twilight Town. I miss the feeling of not having someone to hold. I mean, I know it's only been a day since me and Namine broke it off, but I'm not one of those guys that can live without somebody there to say "I love you." I miss the sweet smell of her perfume, something like pears and mango mixed together.

"Roxas? Honey? Your father's on the phone." I sighed as I reached for the phone, taking a seat in the lounge chair. My Dad was out of town, meeting with his parents since they were both suffering from a car accident. And with the age they have on them, I doubt they'll make it.

"Yeah, Dad?" I rolled my eyes as he told me how bad everything was for him lately, but I knew he still had that signature smile of his. His idol was Tohma Seguchi... President of N.G. records, so his attitude was almost always optimistic.

"You're grandfather says hello, but grandma is in a slight coma right now. Are you helping your mother out while I'm gone?" I looked at her as she placed the dishes in the dishwasher, the stereo playing who-knows-what.

"Yeah, you know it, Dad."

* * *

I watched them all as they headed over to me section of the store. Yeah, I was in Wal-Mart... But where else could I be? I've been working here since I was sixteen and you know what? I haven't even got a nice raise yet. Anyway, I knew they were wanting something, it **was** Marluxia and his stupid gang. I stared at a skinny blonde, her hands were all over Axel as he stared straight ahead, trying to ignore her.

"Well, well, well, look who it is, guys. Roxas. How are you?" I cringed a little as he said my name, my azure eyes watching for something, anything.

"I'm just great, Marluxia. How about **you**?" He frowned and watched me for a little bit longer, then suddenly grabbed me by the collar and leaned in, close to my ear.

"Listen here you little shit, don't mess with me and I won't mess with you, got it?"

"Sorry, but I do recall you walking over to **me**, not the other way around." I looked at Axel, his eyes didn't contain the same mirth they usually did, they actually looked kind of... Worried.

"Marluxia, calm the hell down! He hasn't done anything, okay?" Axel pushed that blonde away and ran between me and Marluxia, which wasn't hard since there was a counter between us. I sighed heavily and looked at Axel thankfully. He nodded and turned to Marluxia. "If Xemnas was here, he'd kick your ass. So get back" Marluxia gasped at the mention of their leader, but took a few steps back.

"Come on, guys. Let's get out of here." I watched them leave, the blonde girl turned to look at Axel, shaking her head at him before leaving with the others. He frowned at her and turned to me.

"I'm sorry about that, Roxas. His... I don't know how to explain it. The guy's just a fuck up." I nodded slowly as I looked up at him, my hands slightly shaking. I just wanted to kill that guy. What could Namine see in him?

"Who was that girl? Your girlfriend?" He snickered and took a seat on the counter.

"Larxene? No way. She wants me, but I don't like girls with a dirty mouth." I pushed him off the counter and glared down at him.

"No sitting on the counter. If you're here to buy something, then buy it." He laughed softly as he got back up, lifting my chin up with his slender fingers.

"The customer's always right, Rox. And I'm here because I want to look around. And that's what I'm going to do." He walked off and stopped to glance back at me. "And by the way... I like what I see. If I didn't.. I wouldn't have saved his ass."

* * *

"Roxas! Roxas! Wait up!" I sneered at the voice coming closer to me as I walked down the sidewalk. "Hey, hey... Has Sora told you anything?" I raised an eyebrow and stopped to look at her, her eyes more of a violet in the dim street light.

"About what, Kairi?" She frowned and held her hands behind her back. I looked at the pink zip up dress she was wearing and saw a slight tear stained area. "What happened? Is he okay?" She looked up at me and sighed.

"I don't know, Roxas. Me and him were at my house watching a movie and then right when we were about to kiss... He looks into my eyes and starts crying on my shoulder." She shook her head and played with the hem of her dress. "Di-Did I do something?" My eyes narrowed on a slim figure walking up behind her, I sighed and nodded to him, slowly walking away.

"Kairi..."

"Oh? Sora!" She embraced him quickly, his eyes closing as he breathed in her scent.

"There is... Something I need to tell you..."

* * *

I took a seat beside my mother, her lively baby blue eyes heavy lidded as she handed me my cell phone. "Namine's called a lot. She wants you back, darling." I sneered at her a little as I placed the phone in my pocket.

"Yeah? Well, I don't want her." She nodded a little as she began to walk up the stairs.

"Oh, and by the way. Your father's coming home tomorrow. Your grandparents had a bad reaction to some medicine and... Well, I'm sure you can guess." I nodded and watched her walk up the stairs. I was a little sad... But I wasn't very close to them, so it wasn't **devastating**. I took out my cell and dialed her number... I wanted to hear what she had to say.

"Okay, I called you back... What do you want?" I heard her whisper something and a groan of protest as she spoke up.

"I want you back, Roxas."

"Okay? And I don't want you back. That's my **final** decision. Have a nice night, bye." I hung up the phone and went into the kitchen, bending down to reach a beer from the fridge. I flinched slightly as hands found their way around my waist. I frowned as I felt hot breath against my right ear.

"Hello, hello, Rox..."

**- Midnights Heart -**

_Yeah... Okay I know I said I'd update this soon, but you know. Things happen. I'm sorry I made you all wait so long... But I'm sorry! And when I actually did decide to update this... My electricity went out. I just got it back on yesterday and added onto this some more today. I hope you all enjoy this chapter, and there will be more to come. Keep reading. And reviews are nice, too. And bye the way, if you don't know who Tohma Seguchi is... It's from an anime called Gravitation. It's very very awesome... And guy on guy, too, haha._


	3. Secrets Revealed

**Never Again**

_- Secrets Revealed -_

I didn't want to turn around. Hell, I didn't **need **to turn around to know who it was. That voice was just too... Too unique. The smell of cigarettes and old spice filled the air around me as I grabbed a beer and shut the door. I didn't see it coming, but I knew his hands were still wrapped around me. I gasped softly as he pinned me to the fridge and stared me down with those glowing emerald eyes.

"Um... Axel? Can you let me go?" I flinched as his face moved closer to mine, but bit my lip as my mind wondered. Did I honestly **want** him to let me go? Or did I like the feel of him close to me like that? I mentally slapped myself as he backed away and looked at the door to the kitchen. "How did you get in this time, Axel?"

He snickered and scratched the back of his head. "It's kind of silly to leave your spare key under the welcome mat... You know? That's the first place anybody would look." His eyes were somewhat dull now, with the soft moonlight coming in through the window. "Has Marluxia done anything since the Wal-Mart incident?"

"No..." I slowly massaged the bridge of my nose as I put the beer down on the counter and leaned against it, the cold tile of the counter felt good against my burning skin. He was bothering me... I don't know if it was in a good way, or a bad way. He made me feel... I don't know. All I do know is my heart was beating ten times too fast, and my blood was hot. I felt like I was going to faint.

"Roxas? You okay?" He walked over to me and looked into my eyes, his dull emerald ones filled now with worry. "Rox?" I took a deep breath as he took my hand and led me outside, the falling rain hitting my face softly. My eyes closed and I leaned against him as the anxiety lifted and my heart slowed down. I sighed and breathed in the scent of his cologne once more. He walked me over to my back porch and helped me lay down on the bench, himself taking a seat in a nearby chair.

"Why are you here, Axel? So often... And yet you hardly know me."

"Well... Maybe I want to know you. Maybe that's why I'm here."

"I see..."

"Well... Tell me about yourself, Roxas. Your life."

* * *

Riiing. Riiiiiiing. I rolled over and stared at the phone. Riiiiiiiing. If it was Axel I was going to have to kill him. I answered the phone and sat up straight as I heard sobbing... Sora's tears.

_"Roxas? I didn't want to do it... But I had to."_ His soft, quick breaths were something nobody wanted to hear. When Sora cried, everyone cried.

"What do you mean? What happened?" He took a shaky, deep breath, and told me everything.

_"__She knows now. I told her everything about me. About Riku... About what I did. I told her I loved her, but not the way she wanted me to. I hurt Kairi, Roxas. I think I broke her heart... And it's all my fault. Why did I have to turn out like this? Why did I have to fall in love with someone I thought was just a best friend? I didn't __**want**__ to be gay, y'know? I didn't __**want**_

_"I'm just your regular person, Axel. I did some stupid things in high school. I drank a lot when my Mom had cancer when I was around fifteen. And I smoked some wed here and there. I never had too many friends to support me besides Hayner, Olette and Pence. My Dad worked a lot but when he wasn't working he was at the Hospital with Mom. As you can see, she's fine now. And so am I."_ I frowned as I thought back to our conversation. I couldn't believe I told him about my life. He asked, and I told. But it wasn't like I had anything to hide... I wasn't some emo kid that cut himself and wanted to die. I just want excitement... Some thrill or an adventure. Something more then what I've got.

* * *

I walked outside and frowned at the bright sun as it shined brightly into my still heavy lidded eyes. I made my way to the mail box and looked through the letters, slowly turning to walk back inside, when suddenly a truck pulled up beside me. I looked this way and that way, trying to see if they were really stopping for me. 

"Eh... Are you Roxas?"

"Um... Maybe?" I stared at the man awkwardly as he grabbed something out of the back seat.

"I'm Xemnas. Leader of Organization XIII. I'm sure you know of that group. I heard some bad things have happened between you and Marluxia. I'm doing my best to take care of that. He won't bother you anymore... And a certain member told me to give this to you." He handed me a partially crumpled up paper and turned the key to his truck. "Have a nice day, Roxas."

I lifted my eyebrow up and stared at the paper. Now **that** was weird. I went back inside and threw the mail on the end table next to the couch, and took a seat.

_Yo, Roxas.  
I'm sorry I bothered you last night. And I'm sorry I was so nosey. Xemnas came back from The World That Never Was and so I told him to kick Marluxia's ass. He didn't do exactly what I told him to do... But he did something that scared the shit out of him. So you owe me now, kid. Meet me at the abandoned park in the Third District._

_- Axel_

* * *

I slowly made my way past the doors to the Third District and looked around at the broken down houses and busted windows. Why would he want to meet me here? My mind wondered as I kept walking, looking for the park that was once a popular attraction among many of the children in Traverse Town. I had seen many pictures of Sora, Riku and Kairi here... Their parents used to bring them here when carnivals were held. 

"So, you found it. Good." I turned around and laughed as I saw Axel sitting on one of the only working swings. His flaming red hair stood out in the darkness of the park.

"Wasn't that hard... This place is so empty." I leaned against the pole of the swing-set and sighed. "So, why are we here?"

He stood and scratched the back of his head. "I don't know... To get away from everything. First District is packed all the time."

I watched him carefully, he wanted something. My mind raced as I thought of what he could do to me here... With nobody around. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. He wouldn't do anything would he? I walked up behind him and placed my hand on his shoulder. "Axel... Let's go."

He nodded slowly, and placed his hand on mine. I could feel the blood rush to my cheeks... His hands felt different... Touching them made me feel something I've never felt before. I cupped his face with one hand and made him face me, looking into his emerald eyes... Only to find tears.

"Axel..." He fell to the ground and pulled out his cigarettes, lighting one up quickly.

"Fuck... Why do I have to be such a fucking pansy when I get off my high. You hate that feeling, Rox? You get all high and shit, then the next thing you know, you're going straight downhill." His hands were shaking as he held the cigarette... So he was just like the rest of them... A fucking druggie.

"You know, I thought you were different from the rest of the Organization." I watched him looked up at me and shake his head.

"You don't get it, Rox. I **am** different. I do drugs less than all the rest of those guys and I'm the nicest one out of them all, probably. You got lucky though... Having me as a friend. But you know, if you hate me now because of what I do, than leave." He inhaled slowly and looked the other way. "And by the way, maybe you should turn in your cloak. Yeah, that's right. I know you're a part of the Organization."

"Fuck you, Axel. That was a long time ago. I'm no part of it now... Xemnas knows that."

"Why was it such a big secret though? How come only you and Xemnas knew about it?"

"Is it any of your fucking business? I was stupid! I didn't know where to go when my Mom was in the Hospital. Xemnas helped me out and that's all. I did some errands for him and what not and he gave me money, drugs, cigs, whatever I needed." He sighed and got up, towering over me.

"Well, Organization members are more than just errand boys. How old were you when you joined?"

"Almost sixteen." He shook his head and looked at me. I knew he was going to do something when I first got here... But is this all? He just wants to torture me about my fucking past?

"So I was nineteen. Hmph. I thought I was the youngest member. Why'd you quit?"

"My Mom got better and so did I. I wasn't all depressed anymore... I enjoyed life again. And I didn't need his help."

Axel nodded his head and threw the cigarette away, walking over to me slowly. "Organization members stick together, you know. Don't forget what you were. And what you said about thinking I was different? Turns out you're not so different either."

I stared at him as he walked off, his slim figure disappearing quickly through the open doors. I walked slowly after him, cocking my head as I heard a voice above me, and looked ahead at the doors, where Axel stood suddenly, turning around, his eyes filled with annoyance.

"Axel? Wait up!" I sighed and kept walking, stopping as she passed by me quickly, almost running into my shoulder. "I've been looking for you, dear."

"Damn it, Larxene. Get a life." He ignored her and stood, waiting on me to catch up to him. I made my way beside him, and gasped as he took me in his arms, holding me tight. "I'm not interested in you, okay, Larx? I've got somebody else." He slowly leaned down, kissing me softly, his hands running down my back, slowly making their way to my ass. I opened my eyes wide, I was unsure, scared, and so not ready for that. But suddenly, I relaxed and closed my eyes, letting him kiss me. I think I **liked** it.

**- Midnights Heart -  
**_Yeah... About the long wait. I'm sorry again!! I will try my best to update quicker... It's just school is really time consuming and I might be switching to home schooling but I don't know yet... So I don't have a lot of time and all that. Well, please keep reading and review!! I like reviews :)_


	4. Misunderstood

**Never Again**  
_-- Misunderstood --_

I didn't know what I was doing. I should have pulled away and told him off… But for some reason I stayed there. I let him kiss me and hold me tight. I feel uneasy and so confused… I don't know what's going on. I mean, I go from one bad thing to another; it's like a never ending cycle. I bit my lip and shook my head as I walked down the empty street. It had only been about an hour ago, he left after Larxene stopped complaining. I snickered a little at the image of her slapping him right before she left. My heart was beating faster and faster as I thought about when he kissed me. But it wasn't real, right? He was just doing it to chase off Larxene. I put my hands in my pockets and sighed, it had been a long day. The setting sun shone brightly in my eyes as I walked towards my house. Honestly, I didn't know what to do. I didn't know whether or not I should have went to his house to talk about it, or if I should just wait and see if he calls. I chose the easiest one.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

I opened my eyes slowly and walked over to the window where I saw red spiky hair and gorgeous emerald eyes. As I looked into those eyes my heart started beating rapidly. My mind wondered as to why he would be here right now, but then I remembered the kiss. I opened the window and smiled at him; he stood for a few seconds then took a seat on my bed.

"Look, Rox. I'm sorry if I freaked you out earlier. Larxene just needed to get the hint that I'm not into her." I nodded and took a seat at my computer; I couldn't stop thinking about that kiss. He stared at me as I touched my lips, my eyes becoming heavy and my heart slowing down. It finally downed on me. He had used me to scare away Larxene. He didn't really **want** to kiss me. My eyes widened and I shook my head. It wasn't like it mattered to me anyway, he's just some fucked up guy with an attitude problem. But he **kissed** me. A freakin' **guy** kissed me. What's his problem? Does he think I'm gay? Yeah, right.

"Look, Axel. Stay away from me, alright? I'm not gay and I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong ideas by letting you kiss me. I just thought I'd help you out. Now, how about getting your ass out of my house?"

"Oh, so that's how you really feel? Sure, I'll leave, but you owe me, and you know it. I saved your ass from getting kicked quite a few times lately, and you know you owe me, big."

"I don't owe you anything!" He walked closer to me, I got out of the chair and backed up, he might not be some big strong guy, but he **was** bigger than me… My heart started racing as my back hit the wall; he was just inches away from my face, his hot breath teasing my lips.

"You want me to leave, Roxas? You **really** want me to leave?" My mouth moved, but nothing came out. I didn't know what to say. I wanted him to leave before… But now it's like I wanted him to stay that close to me. Finally I nodded my head and fell down to the floor. So many thoughts and emotions invaded my mind. I didn't know what to do or what to think. He looked down at me and sighed, I think he was upset. But I was too out of it to notice anything. The angst took over my body as I just lay there, trying to figure out what was wrong with me.

* * *

"Sora, I don't know what to do." The brunet smiled at me as Riku took a seat with us. "It isn't funny, you know." 

"I never said it was funny, Roxas. I think it's cute." Riku nodded and got a handful of popcorn.

"Yeah, Sora's right. It's cute. But I never would have guessed."

"Guessed what? No! I'm not gay." Riku cocked his head and started the movie, Sora laying his head on his lover's shoulder. "Why would you think I'm gay?" They both sighed and turned to look at me.

"You liked the kiss and then you basically had an anxiety attack when he got close to you again. That must mean something, right Riku?" Riku nodded and kissed him on the cheek.

"I came here for advice, not for you two to tell me I'm gay when I'm not." I looked at Sora anxiously and grabbed his arm, pulling him outside with me. "I'm stealing your boyfriend for a second, okay Riku?" I vaguely heard him shout okay as I shut the door. "Look, Sora. I need help. I hate him! He used me to scare off Larxene!"

Sora shook his head and took a seat on the porch, his eyes closed. "Roxas… Maybe he didn't just do it to scare her off. Maybe he used that as an excuse to kiss you. Ever think of that?" What I was thinking that moment was what any guy would think. I. Hate. Axel. It really wasn't my fault that he had issues with Larxene and ended up using a friend of his to get away from her. I massaged my temples and took a deep breath. I. Am. Not. Gay. I knew I wasn't, but from what Sora says… I don't know. I mean, yeah I let him kiss me, but Hell. That was the first kiss I've had in a while.

"Well, I'm not gay. He might be, but I'm not. I'm starting to hate him, Sora."

"You know what? Being in denial is the worst thing you could do right now. I did the same thing before I got with Riku and he almost gave up on me. But I realized that I liked him and admitted it. And you know what happened?" He smiled and looked through the window at the silver haired man lying on the couch. "I'm extremely happy now. More than I could ever imagine."

* * *

I hate the world. I hate love. I hate angst. You know what? How about I just hate everything? I honestly couldn't think. My mind was foggy and light. I looked down at the beer and pot and fell back onto my bed. Beer. Pot. Aren't they a great combination? I haven't been high in forever and having a pure high and being drunk at the same time – would equal happiness. It wasn't that I was depressed, and it wasn't that I would lovesick. It was because my life had flipped upside-down in a matter of days and I was completely confused. 

"What the hell are you doing, Roxas?" It was the bastard. The evil doer that caused me to end up like this. Axel.

"I – I don't know. I'm – I'm confused. You… Me. Everything is just so…" He moved closer and touched my face with his cold hands. "So… Why did you kiss me?" He stared at me long and hard, not one blink.

"Because… You're becoming a part of my life." I blinked a few times and glanced the other way, gasping as he pulled me to him, my legs wrapped around his body.

"What're you... Axel?" I swallowed hard as he pushed me against the wall, my bare back held firmly against it. There was no complaining, no desire to stop him. I blame the pot and beer. But I know the truth. I wanted it just like he knew I did.

**-- Midnights Heart --  
**_Yeah… So I take a while to update sometimes… Don't hate me. This story is kind of falling apart, but I'm going to try and keep it up. Please keep reading and reviewing. I love you all._


	5. Confusion

**Never Again  
**_Confusion _

Could it be that you're one thing one day, and then the next thing you know, you're another? The way I feel now could never be felt again. Yesterday I felt confused… Torn in half. Unsure of what I was. And today, I'm content. I feel whole again and sure of myself. I would probably thank Axel for that, but I don't think he needs the credit. My heart feels weak though… Like I need something to make it stronger. What I didn't know was that it would be a long time before I stopped denying the truth. Denying my feelings and denying who I truly, honestly was.

* * *

"So, how're you and Axel coming along, Roxas?" I was out of it. I wasn't there. I was in a far off land… I thought it was the land of lust and passion, but I would find out the complete opposite later. If you haven't guessed it yet… Axel gave me head. Yes, I know. 'Oh, Roxas! You said you weren't gay! What are you DOING?' Actually… No. You all are probably drooling on your keyboard at the thought. I'm still not gay, okay? What he did was just something I needed. It's basically like a girl doing it... Same feeling and same pleasure. Well… Okay, I'll admit one thing. Axel was damn good at it. 

"Basically best friends. But I'm tired of being single, Sora." I sighed and closed my eyes, taking a seat on a nearby bench. "What do you think of Kairi? Can I try it out?" Sora gasped softly and smiled at me.

"But I thought… Oh never mind. Sure, try it I guess." I gave him a quick side hug and ran over to her, her dark brown hair pulled back into a small pony tail and her gorgeous azure eyes sparkling with mirth.

"Oh! Hey, Roxas! How're you?" I watched her as she smiled at me, her face flawless.

"I'm fine. What about you, Kairi?" She nodded her head and looked at a nearby bench where Sora now sat, talking with Riku… Don't ask how he showed up… Because I don't know.

"Wow… They look happy. Wish I could have that again." Her azure eyes closed as she took a deep breath. I took her hand and looked at her.

"Well, maybe I can help. Want to come over to my house after a movie?" Kairi jumped up and giggled as she hugged me tight.

"Of course! I'd love to!" I glanced over at Sora, he was looking at me now… Somewhat annoyed. It wasn't my fault that I liked her. And plus, I needed something new.

* * *

What could happen when you take a lonely girl to a movie? Well. We'll just find out. I held her hand as we walked down the sidewalk, the cool breeze against our bodies.

"Well, you want to come in?" She nodded slowly and walked with me up to me room. What she did was something I'm not used to… Most of the time I'm dominate during these things… But she pushed me against the door and kissed me long, and rough. Her warm hands unbuttoned my jeans as I unzipped her own. I smiled as she took her shirt off, then her bra. Our bodies touched, but I felt nothing. Our hips collided but I felt aloof. I pounded inside of her, but it felt as if I wasn't there. She came. And so did I. But did I enjoy it? Was it what I wanted? I thought I was. But it turned out, what I needed was realization to dawn on me. But as I said earlier, that won't happen for a while. Kairi put her clothes back on and kissed me softly, her sweet, cherry flavored gloss tasted good as she entered her warm tongue… The passion returning. But I wasn't there… I still wasn't there. Distant. Dead.

"Well, thanks Roxas. I'll see you later, okay?" I frowned, but watched her leave, her body slim and beautiful. Why did I feel like such an idiot? My body was there, but my mind was thinking of him. I felt so stupid. I was frustrated… No matter what my mind always went back to that stupid bastard. I didn't want anything to do with him. He was a friend. Just a friend. I didn't like him. I didn't love him. He saved me once or twice… So what? That didn't mean anything. I didn't owe him anything. And even if I did it wouldn't be love. I kept denying it. And I never thought I'd admit it. And I didn't… Not for a while anyways.

_Outside…_

'_Well… Guess he's found something else. I should just give up at this point. I don't feel like being a crazy psycho who's madly in love with Blondie in there… I'll just wait. He'll have to admit it sometime…'_

* * *

My life was basically fucked up now. I laid there… Thinking of him. I knew he was out there. I knew it. He watched the whole thing and he knew I was confused and upset. But I didn't care. I just laid there. Thinking of him. Thinking of Axel.

**Midnights Heart  
**_I updated finally… Yay. And I got braces today… Boo. Well, I'll update this again as soon as I can… Be patient if you can. Please review!! And sorry that it's so short... I'll make the next one longer, I promise._


	6. Dreams

**Never Again  
**_Dreams_

_He was sweating, his heart pounding. Pain coursed through his body as the red-head finally filled him. Pain and erotic pleasure intertwined as he arched his back, breathing heavier each second. Roxas threw his head back as the older man pounded him harder and faster. It was different, something he would've thought he'd never do. But he felt love with this man. Something he had never felt before. Well, at least he __**thought**__ it was love. The red-head kissed him deeply, both panting and gasping for air. Axel kissed him again, tenderly this time as their hard lengths touched, passion taking over their bodies. Roxas reached for his own throbbing member, and bit his lip as Axel grabbed it and moved his hand with the rhythm of his thrusts. Roxas moaned louder this time, his eyes closed as he ran his hands down the sides of his lover--  
_

I woke up that night, confused and violated. Nothing like that would ever happen and it didn't need to be in my dreams. I've never felt that way for a man and never will. My body was cold, but a stream of sweat lined my back and forehead. I was going to have to do something soon… He was haunting my thoughts, my dreams, and my life.

The clock flashed in front of me as I glared at the neon numbers; 2:46. I slowly got up and put on some sweat pants. He only lived a few streets away, and plus, it was his fault for waking me up in the middle of the night, so he should be annoyingly waken up, too. It was chilly, the cool breeze stung against my skin as I made my way down the street. What was I suppose to say? 'You had sex with me in my dream, so I hate your guts!'? Yeah, sure. I frowned at the house in front of me; dark red brick and a nice, huge porch. He lived well for a guy of his standards. Before I knew what I was doing, I had already rang the doorbell. After about five minutes I turned around, only to find myself facing the man that had haunted my dreams.

"A stalker? Hmm… Well, at least he's cute." Axel walked by me and opened the door, holding it open for me to walk in. I have to admit… When he isn't being an ass… He's pretty cool.

"Sorry, no stalker here, Axel. Oh wait… It's you." I watched as he shook his head, taking a seat next to a small electric fireplace.

"Yeah well, watching a Roxas-Kairi porno is pretty tempting. Especially when it's live."

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"No, not me. It's you. You keep denying your feelings when they're right in front of your fucking face. You're in complete denial." Denial. I knew that word would come into play sooner or later.

"I am **not **in denial. I don't like you like that, I'm **straight**. Get that through your thick skull."

"Oh yeah? Is that why you kissed back the other day? Is that why you're at my house? By the way… Why **are** you here?" My mind completely went black. My mouth shut and I just stared at him. How could I have forgotten why I was—Oh yeah. The dream.

"I had a dream… And I'm tired of having you haunt everything; my thoughts, my dreams, and my life. You've violated my privacy. You've done everything in the world to make me hate you. And yet you want me to come out and say I love you? You must be out of it, Axel."

"Well fine. Leave. Don't talk to me, don't even think of me. If that's what you want." I nodded and took my leave. There were no second thoughts, no backward glances. Just me leaving, and him watching.

* * *

I gasped; he wasn't going to let me go. I knew that before I got to the door. He pushed me against the wall and kissed me, long and hard. I couldn't help but to kiss back, the sweet taste of peppermint graced his gorgeous mouth. I pulled back, panting hard, and I looked him in the eyes and shook my head.

"I hate you!" He snickered and grinded his hips into mine, his forehead resting against my own.

"I love you." I widened my eyes and stared into the pools of emerald green beauty before me. He said the three words I never wanted him to say. The three words I never wanted, or imagined any man to tell me.

He took off my shirt and licked my neck, my ears. I tried to hold back the soft gasps of pleasure as he moved down to my stomach, kissing it softly along the edge of my sweat pants, licking down across it and blowing on the long line of kisses afterwards, sending chills down my spine. Did I want this? Was I **really** letting him touch me? I moaned as his hands moved slowly down my boxers, teasing my stiff member. He smiled up at me as he slowly inched my pants off. He was going to do the exact same thing he did last time… My breath hitched as he pushed my against the wall, somehow—I don't know when—He took his own clothes off. I looked down at his long, hard cock. It was throbbing; he wanted to fill me, just like in my dream. But was I sure? Did I truly want him to do this? I looked around, he was gone… I quickly tried to put on my clothes, but he rushed up behind me and tied my hands together behind my back. I moaned, he was dominate, taking control over me… And it was turning me on. Axel smiled, and threw me to the floor, putting both of his knees beside my head, and bucked his hips forwards, teasing my mouth with his cock. I turned my head, refusing to do such a disgusting thing.

"I did it for you, and so now… You owe me."

So many thoughts rushed through my mind as I opened my mouth, pleasuring him the best I could. His moans and gasps were enough to make me cum right then and there. But I refused to let him know that. I smiled as he came in my mouth. I licked my lips and smiled up at him as he collapsed on top of me, his face next to my own. I moaned softly as his leg brushed against my throbbing cock, making me cum, it had built up so much from his moans… I closed my eyes and lay beside him after he untied my hands. I was… Refreshed… Relieved. It felt like a thousand tons had been lifted off my shoulders. But I could tell this wasn't the end. Not yet.

**Midnights Heart**

_Another long wait… I apologize once again. I'll update this as soon as I can. I'm sorry, it's just school is frustrating and time consuming. But Thanksgiving break is coming soon, so I should update around then. Please review._


	7. Acceptance

**Never Again**

- Acceptance -

**Author Notes** - _Okay, so I'm going to try my best and write more in my chapters. Usually it's just a thousand words or less, but I've been reading a lot of other stories and they're so much longer then mine. It might take me a little longer to update, but I think it'll be worth it. Oh, and by the way... I want to share an awesome story with you. __Sephiroth's Guide to Love and Deception.__ That is a very good story. She's even writing a sequel now; __Sephiroth's Guide to Marriage and Murder__. I highly suggest you read them both... The first one first, of course. Okay... Now, onto the story._

* * *

My eyes gazed over his sleeping body... The strong smell of his cologne filling the air. The moonlight played upon his skin, pale and flawless. I couldn't believe myself. I let myself be used... Used for something I thought I'd never do. My throat clenched as I gagged, thinking of last night's sin. I was never going to let that happen again. The taste of his cum still lingered on my tongue; salty and bland. My feet dragged on the floor as I made my way to the door, opening it slowly, cringing as it creaked long and loud. He groaned and rolled over, grasping onto a nearby blanket. I mentally sighed as I closed it ever so softly, finally out of that hell hole. A car's tires squealed nearby, all I could see was blonde hair; Probably Larxene. I had about a million and one things racing through my mind... Why did I let this happen? Am I okay with what happened? Will I confront him about it? Or should I just completely avoid him from now on? I couldn't decide on what to do. He was trying to make me come to him... He wanted me to fall in love with him. But I knew better then that. I wasn't gay. Never would be. I ran my fingers through my hair as I walked down the street, the sun peeking from behind a small hill. Finally, I found myself at my house, the car gone as usual... Mom must have gone to pick up dad at the airport. I opened the door and found myself staring into bright azure eyes. She smiled up at me, her pale blonde hair pulled to her right side as usual.

"What are –"

"Before you say anything, Roxas. Give me a chance to explain." She grabbed my hand and led me to my room, sitting me down on the bed. "I want to apologize. For everything that's happened lately. It was my fault and –"

"Shit. Don't even start, Naminé. I told you before; I don't want anything to do with you. I've moved on and I'm happy now." I pushed her out of my way as she stepped in front of me, not letting me leave the room. "Now just get out of my house and go run to Marluxia." I shook my head as I heard her gasp. I didn't care if I was being rude, she had done much worse then that to me. She lied and cheated… And expects me to take her back? I hope she's kidding.

"But Roxas! I can't go back to him. He's… So boring. The sex is nothing like what it was with you…" She placed her hand on my shoulder and whispered in my ear. "You remember… Don't you?"

"We did that once, Naminé. And yeah, it was good… But come on. He's probably too high to know what he's doing half the time, so you can't blame him for being so bad." She giggled a little as I turned to face her, her blue eyes glistening with mirth. A smile found it's way to my lips as she wrapped her arms around me, the candy-sweet scent of her enveloped me, hypnotized me.

"How the hell could you leave without telling me?" I stopped abruptly as the stupid voice entered my head. I cringed and turned around, frowning at the red-head before me.

"How the fuck do you keep getting in my house?"

"As I said before, Rox; Bad hiding place for a key. And you didn't even change it after I told you the first time. Pathetic."

"No... You know what's pathetic? You, Axel. Why do you keep trying and trying? It's not going to work, okay?" I had almost forgotten Naminé was still there. I could tell she was completely confused, but right then I didn't really care.

"Oh, it'll work. Don't you worry about that. I can tell… I know exactly how you feel. You wouldn't have done what did last night if you didn't feel **something** towards me."

"Wait… You think Roxas likes you? What do you mean what he did last night? I don't get it..," I stared at her in disbelief… Maybe that's a reason I kind of don't miss her... She was blonde. But wait… I'm blond. Axel took her hand and bent down to look into her confused eyes.

"Nam… Go home and go to bed. You seriously need the sleep." She stomped her foot and walked over to me, wrapping her hands around my waist.

"Roxas and I were in the middle of something, Axel. I think it's you that needs to leave." I shook my head and pulled away from her, staring into Axel's emerald eyes. He wasn't going to give up… I knew that. But I was never going to give in, either. He stared right back into my eyes, not even blinking. It was going to be hard to escape him… But I was going to try. Hard.

"Roxas, can I please just talk to you? Alone?" I figured it was best… Since Naminé was just going to be an annoying burden. Rolling my eyes, I walked over to her and spoke gently.

"Naminé, go home, okay? I need to talk to him alone… And by the way… You and I are **over**, so stop trying to get me back. It won't work." She frowned at me and walked over to Axel, shoving him out of her way as she stomped down the hallway and down the stairs. We both cringed as the door was slammed, practically shaking the whole house.

"What do you want, Axel?" He leaned against the wall and looked around the room.

"What do you think I want? I want you to come out of the closet." He simply stared at me as I massaged the bridge of my nose. When was he going to understand that I **wasn't** gay! I wasn't now, and never would be.

"I am not gay, Axel! When will you understand those words?" He walked closer to me and leaned his face in close to mine; I backed up, hitting the edge of the bed. But I knew better then to fall on it, he would take advantage of that.

"When your heart stops beating so fast around me." I gasped as his hands tugged on the waist of my pants. He leaned in closer then he was before and stayed there… If he would move one more inch he would have kissed me, but I knew what he was doing. He was teasing me… Making me want to take the bait right in front of me. But if I did… It would give him the wrong – Would it really be the **wrong** idea? I almost did it, but quickly pulled away, his emerald eyes staring at me with something I'd never seen before from him.

"My heart doesn't beat fast around you. You're just imagining things!" He grabbed my hand and placed it on my chest. I could feel it beating… But not extremely fast. Not until he kissed me at least. My eyes closed as his lips found their way to mine. I moaned… Reluctantly. I didn't need him knowing that I liked what he was doing…

"Roxas… Tell me the truth…" I avoided his eyes… I didn't know what to say. Did I like him? Did I honestly truly like him? I looked at him; I examined his flawless skin, his gorgeous glowing green eyes, and his flaming red hair. Yes, I was attracted to him. Very much so.

"I like you… But I don't know about that love stuff. Not yet, Axel." He pressed his forehead against mine and pushed me down onto the bed. I bit my lip as I let my hands slide down his sides, stopping at his waist. I didn't know what I was doing… And then…

"Roxas! Are you home?" I pushed him off of me as I recognized the voice; my father. Axel ran his fingers through his hair and looked in the mirror, making sure he looked presentable.

"What are you doing? Get out of here, Axel!" He stared at me and put his hands on his hips. "Well? Go, Ax–" I turned and looked at the door, my parents standing there.

"Oh, Roxas. Is this a new friend?" I nodded slowly as my Dad walked closer, shaking Axel's hand. "Nice to meet you. Your name?" I watched as Axel looked at me, then my father.

"Axel. It's nice to meet you, too." I frowned and left the room, my Mom following.

"Roxas! That isn't the same boy I see with that gang is it?" I rolled my eyes and turned to face her.

"Actually, yeah it is. But honestly… He's completely different then the rest of them."

"That's what they all say. Be careful, Roxas."

* * *

I stared at the sky, the stars scattered amongst eternal darkness. Still staring, I took a drag of the joint, thinking of him. Thinking of how crazy I was to actually admit to him that I felt something towards him. I felt so stupid… So crazy. I shivered a little as the cold air traveled up my shirt. It was coming close to winter, and I **hate** winter. I sat up, my elbows resting on my knees. Everything was so stressful lately and I didn't understand the half of it. I hadn't seen him for three days now, and I'm kind of grateful for it. It's given me the time to think about things. I thought of Kairi, of Naminé. Kairi used me… And I guess I used her. And now Naminé's been getting in the way. I picked up my phone and stared at the number that showed up.

"Hello? What do you want, Naminé?"

"I wanted to know if you needed some release."

"Release?" I turned my head to the side quickly as someone took a seat beside me. Naminé. She took my hand and led me to the back room of my house, where she and I always messed around when we were dating. I reluctantly locked the door… Not looking her in the eyes.

I lifted her pale white dress over her head, admiring the black g-string she wore. My mind was blank as she took off my own clothes, stroking my cock. I swallowed hard, watching her take off the underwear, looking at me the whole time. It should have turned me on… Everything she did should have turned me on. But all I could think of was Axel. She pushed me onto the couch, and straddled me, my cock slowly entering her wet pussy. She rode me, hard and fast… I came as her soaking cunt contracted against my cock; her orgasm soon following. I looked up at her, my eyes questioning.

"I'm on birth control, don't worry." I nodded as she lay beside me, the scent of her sweet perfume hypnotizing me once again. She wrapped her arms around my waist and fell asleep, with me lying there, wide awake. I was unsure of everything I was doing. I was just letting these things happen… I didn't even think about any of it. I didn't want to have sex with her… I didn't even want to converse with her. And yet I did.

* * *

I was walking down the street about two weeks after the Naminé incident and of course, passed Organization XIII. They stared, but Xemnas was there, and of course took control over them. I looked back at them, noticing Axel avoiding me. Without moving, I called Xemnas over; he nodded and followed me into a nearby alley.

"Why's Axel been avoiding me? Did I do something?"

"Rumor's been going around about Naminé. She threw up yesterday morning and went to buy a pregnancy test just a few minutes ago. And she… Well. Marluxia told her to go have sex with you… For a price. And she needed the money. So everyone knows you're the one she fucked. But then again, Marluxia and her do it frequently, too. So nobody's really sure about anything."

"Shit." I massaged my temples as I leaned against the brick wall of the alley. He put his hand on my shoulder and sighed. He was never really comforting to anybody, but he raised me as his little brother in a way. Xemnas had always been there for me. "What am I supposed to do, Xemnas?"

"I don't know, Rox. Axel's confused as hell and doesn't know what to say to you." He leaned against the wall beside me and crossed his arms. "Talk to Naminé and see what she has to say. Knowing her, she'll want an abortion, no matter what anybody says."

I looked up at him and closed my eyes. He didn't know what to do, and neither did anyone else. He left as a man in a black hood walked over beside me.

"Hey, Roxas. I head about Naminé."

"Yeah, well I'm sure a lot of people have."

He pulled the cloak back and looked down at me. I stared into the emerald green eyes as he put his arm around my shoulders, and walked down the alley with me. He kicked an empty pop can out of our way as we came upon his street. We walked up to his house, pausing at the door.

"Look… I'm sorry if I made you do anything you didn't want to do. And I'm sorry about what happened with Naminé. I did the same thing with Larxene when I was stressed and confused about you; except she didn't get pregnant…" I frowned at those last few words, but walked into his house after he unlocked the door. I took a seat on his couch and nodded as he came out of the kitchen with two beers. Taking a few sips, I laid back against the couch, thinking about everything.

"So what made you do it?

"I don't know, Axel. I was high and confused. And I hadn't seen you since I admitted I liked you that one day. So I didn't know what to do."

"I'm sorry. I was trying to give you some much needed space." He looked at me and smirked, his emerald eyes sparkling with who knows what. "And plus, I wanted you to really **want** me when you saw me again. You know… Be slightly sexually frustrated. That way I could have some fun with you."

"What… Kind of fun?" He leaned over to me, devouring my lips as his hands wondered down to the waist of my pants. "Pervert…" He snickered, but didn't stop. I felt my heart pounding fast; it was true. I liked him. A lot. I placed the beer on a nearby table as he pushed me down onto the couch.

He slowly took off my pants, kissing the tip of my cock teasingly. He then took his own pants off, making our lengths touch with only a thin layer of boxers preventing them from touching fully. I moaned, my hands swiftly taking his shirt off, followed by mine flying somewhere behind the couch. Axel grinded our hips together, making me moan even more. I arched my back as our boxers were thrown to the side; our cocks touching. He stuck his fingers into my mouth as I sucked on them, preparing them for their entrance. I sighed as they entered me, stretching and preparing me for what would come next. He kissed me, trying to distract me as his length hovered above my entrance.

"You ready?" I nodded, swallowing hard. I gasped as he entered me, my entrance stretching to hold his cock. I grabbed onto his shoulders, my nails digging into his skin. His hand found its way to my throbbing member, stroking it in rhythm with his thrusts. I winced in pain as he went deeper, his entire cock inside of me. My breath hitched as he slammed back into me, hitting that special spot that almost made me scream out in pleasure. He kissed me, muffling my moans of wanton desire. I came, my seed covering his stomach and my own. I screamed his name as he came inside of me… Pulling out soon after, laying beside me as we both closed our eyes, panting heavily.

* * *

Naminé knocked on his window, peeking in but not seeing a thing. She cursed silently to herself as she thought of where he might be. Axel's.

She got in her car and drove to his house, noticing the lights were off. She frowned, but knocked on the door; no one answered. She turned the doorknob, gasping as it swung open, revealing the two men naked before her…

* * *

**Author Notes** - _Yay, I updated. And I hate Microsoft Word. It always says you spell everything wrong with Kingdom Hearts names. And even non Kingdom Hearts stuff. Anyway… Please review and keep reading. I hope you liked this chapter! Please, please, please review! I love to hear what you all have to say. And if you want, give me some new ideas for this story. Thanks for reading! And sorry about Naminé's OOCness… And Xemnas', too. Sorry I couldn't make it longer… I'm not good at this stuff… heh. I love all of you! _

**- Midnights Heart -**


	8. Relief and Distress

**Never Again**

_Chapter Eight - Relief_

* * *

I frowned as she paced back and forth in front of me, Axel in the next room getting some soda for the three of us. 

"I just don't know what to do! I mean… There's something I need to tell you… But I don't know if I should."

"Well, Naminé, if it's something you need to tell me, you should probably tell me." She frowned as Axel handed her the soda. I gave him a small smile as he took a seat beside me, his arm wrapping around my waist.

"Fine." She took a seat across from us in a small chair, her legs crossed as she shook her foot with anxiety. Naminé played with her hair a little as she opened her mouth, the next few words hardly audible. "I was already pregnant when I had sex with you."

"What?" I opened my eyes wide and looked from Axel to her; I was relieved. This whole time I thought she was going to tell me she was pregnant and it was my kid. The cup in my hand fell to the floor with a muffled thump as I ran to her and picked her up, hugging her tight. I let go quickly though as I remembered she was pregnant.

"Well, Nam, what are you going to do? Have you told Marluxia?" She shook her head, her right hand holding the wrist of her left arm. "Well, maybe if you tell him, it'll straighten him up!" I could tell she was thinking about that, her eyes averted and were lost in thought.

"You really think it might, Axel?" He shrugged as he took a sip of coke.

"It might. It would me."

The night went by pretty fast after that; we talked about a lot of things. Random and not. She said that if Marluxia changed once she told him she was pregnant with his baby, then she'd stay with him. I told her he was a good guy when he was sobered up. Naminé agreed. Once she left me and Axel talked about us; about what I though of him and if I truly would be with him. Honestly, I'm not sure… And I told him that. I told him that I'd see how things go.

* * *

Axel and I were just friends. Friends with benefits at this point. We talked and kissed and fucked; But I was wanting more, and I already knew he did. We were always put in awkward situations though, when one of us brought it up. But then, one day I came home from work, Wal-Mart apron in my hand, and there was a note on the door.

_Roxas,_

_I've been thinking a lot about you and me, and I've came up with something. You like me, and I like you. So why not date? I mean, it's not like were seeing other people anyway. It's just been you and me. So, yeah. You and I are meant to be a couple. Go through the right door if you agree, or go upstairs and to the left if you don't agree. Pick the __right__ one. ._

_Axel_

I sighed, looking at the many arrows pointing to the right door, and the many sad smiley faces leading upstairs. My mind went blank as I walked towards the scent of his cologne. The strong, tart scent of Gravity… My favorite brand of cologne that he knew drove me crazy. I could hear the soft music from his favorite rock radio station as I got closer to the door. My hand grabbed the doorknob as I took a long deep breath, preparing for an odd Axel in some weird outfit; But smiled as I found a portrait of me and him together, a note leaning against it.

_Roxas,_

_You're a smart kid. I knew you'd pick the right door. Now, crawl out the window, just like I've had to do many times at your house. But this time it's easier since it's only on the first floor :D When you get outside, walk up the hill. You'll find me there._

_Axel_

I rolled my eyes, a small smirk formed at my lips though as I jumped out the window, a pile of pillows awaiting me at the ground. I got up, mesmerized by the beautiful moon, seemingly sitting on top of the hill I was to walk up. I quickly made my way there.

* * *

"You made it. I was starting to worry." Axel turned around; facing the one person he didn't want to see at the moment. "Oh, it's just you."

"Just me? What the hell, Axel! What happened to you and me? We were just fine until HE happened." The blonde ran her fingers through her hair, slightly tugging at the roots.

"We weren't fine, Larxene. I never _loved _you. You and I were friend with benefits. There was nothing special about that." He turned his back to her as she sneered at him. She was hurt.

"Friends with benefits? The hell? Friends with benefits don't hang out 24/7 and kiss and make out all the time, Axel. We were something special. I was more then happy with you! And then Naminé went and screwed up so you ended up saving that stupid boyfriend of hers. And then what happens. You end up falling for him. It's just so STUPID, Axel."

"Whatever, Larxene. I'm busy right now, so it'd be nice if you left me alone." Axel turned back to face her, eyes widened with fear as he came face to face with a gun. "Put the gun down, Larx. Don't be like this."

"No! This is something I have to do." She turned around as she heard footsteps behind her.

"Axel?" Roxas gasped as the gun was then aimed at him. "Larxene? What are you doing here?" Axel snuck up behind her, preparing himself if she were to shoot. He had to save Roxas from getting hurt.

"Roxas! Go home; it's not safe here anymore." Roxas screamed as she pulled the trigger; everything went black.

* * *

**Midnights Heart**

_I'll update soon_


	9. The End

The red head smiled at him as he came back from placing flowers on her grave. It was a strange day for a funeral. The sun was shining and the beautiful snow was outlining the many colors of the flowers amongst the newly filled grave. I know what you're wondering. What happened last time; when everything went black? Well, isn't it quite obvious? Larxene pulled the trigger and shot herself; and Axel tackled Roxas, both of them landing on the cold ground. He hit his head pretty hard, which made him black out.

Roxas sighed as Marluxia and his gang walked past them. It was a sad day, but he was just glad they were safe.

"Come on, Rox. Let's go home.


End file.
